Otago Daily Times Queenstown bureau chief Tracey Roxburgh documents her progress in the 12-week Revive programme at Alpine Health and Fitness.
Dear Diary ...
Saturday, November 10
Did RPM Max this morning. Was torture. Almost stopped when reached track five when realised wasn't even halfway.
Managed to survive 60 minutes of pedalling and then thought - stupidly - would go for a wee jog on treadmill.
After five minutes, a string dangling on treadmill started to annoy me, so tried to adjust it. Turns out it was attached to "Emergency Stop" thingamejig.
Narrowly avoided spectacular faceplant. Decided this was sign to cease physical exertion today.
This afternoon enjoyed beautiful Sara Bole's hen's do - once again dressed like numpty, completely sober.
Got unexpected abdominal workout when boys from Hall Pass arrived ...far more enjoyable abdominal work out than any other in the past few weeks.
Took my leave early and enjoyed cup of tea while torturing myself by watching Food Channel.
Lady made carrot cake with cream cheese icing. I dined on dry Cruskit and tried to pretend it was carrot cake.
Sunday, November 11
This is seventh Sunday have not woken up with self-inflicted sickness. Do not miss that feeling.
However, after receiving heartbreaking news this morning, seriously contemplated purchasing a bottle of wine and consuming every drop. Instead forced myself to have one last go at triathlon.
Turned speed dial up on treadmill knowing faster legs were forced to move, sooner it would be over. Managed to go tiny bit faster than Friday night.
And did not require stretcher.
Also, had odd feeling of excitement ahead of gym visit tomorrow morning, largely because I knew Haylee would not make me do triathlon again.
Monday, November 12
Was correct. No triathloning.
Instead, Haylee took me into weights room. For past seven weeks have only been upstairs in cardio room ... I like it there. Same cannot be said for downstairs.
Was put through paces on machines and made me push and pull bars and such. She was also unnaturally enthusiastic to get me on "Booby Machine". Later made to do walking lunges holding weights. Nearly fell over several times - think I stuck tongue out while trying to remain upright (clearly aids balance).
This afternoon saw beautiful Kate Batkin. She says I have inspired her to go back to gym. Suggested she exercise with me and she seemed agreeable - she made silly mistake of giving me almost all of her contact details ...hopefully she doesn't talk to Margo Berryman before our first gym date.
Tuesday, November 13
This was 50th day of being good.
Managed to convince Kate and Margo to go to Pump this evening.
During Pump found myself making odd noises again - tried desperately to be positive though, for example, before exercises I don't really like (basically everything) exclaimed "Yay".
Unfortunately have not yet mastered art of hiding sarcasm so didn't convince anyone (myself included).
Wednesday, November 14
While getting ready for work at gym realised had left belt at home. Not ideal given crotch of jeans now hangs about 10cm from where it should be.
Am not complaining, but found myself dangerously close to resembling one of those who has waist of jeans slung around underside of buttock region. Is not attractive.
This morning popped in to Southern PR to farewell Kristy Norton, who is off to lie on beaches in Vanuatu. There were cupcakes there. And muffins.
Then Fiona Woodham started talking about potatoes, which made me think of hot chips, gravy and aioli.
Instead drank water and pretended not to want treats.
Later, Hire a Mum's Moira Finlin visited and brought beautifully wrapped parcel. Knew there was strong likelihood whatever was in it would be on list of banned substances.
Correct. Contained delicious Afghan biscuits - in my top five favourite biscuits of all time! Then had to go to New World and take photograph of award-winning pork sausages ... and they gave me some to try. They were quickly put in freezer.
Thursday, November 15
Today was accidental rest day.
Had intentions to walk up Tobin's Track this morning, but when alarm went off could not prise myself from comfort of bed.
After emotional day, thought would do me good to go for quiet walk - except when I took high heels off, legs started protesting.
In particular those wee muscles behind knees.
They refused to straighten and then after time spent bonding with couch they didn't want to bend.
Figured Tobin's could wait.
Friday, November 16
Recall at outset of challenge Haylee said week four would be hard, mostly because we would be sick of salad.
Was braced for week four ...only to find was still enjoying the greens on my plate. Was not braced for this arriving in week eight. Am sick to back teeth of salad.
Have done miraculously well thus far to avoid temptation, but this afternoon fabulous people from Tip Top pushed me to breaking point.
They gave me a box of ice creams.
They have now joined bikkies and Christmas cake I bought from Waitiri Creek in tormenting me (don't even like Christmas cake, but this one has fruit "macerated" in pinot noir and then another whole glass of pinot noir poured over the actual cake ... Could. Not. Resist).
There is school of thought which says is OK for me to have a "taste" of one of my treats. Except it's not, because if I have just one teeny tiny taste, before you know it I will be hiding in bedroom, crouched on floor behind door demolishing entire plate of Afghans, box of Trumpets and Christmas cake, like a scavenger.
Would then likely go into sugar shock and be found days later with the remnants of delicious treats all over my face and the floor.
Just 30 days to go ... sweet baby Jesus, give me strength!