My last column about attitude being a choice (''Choose your Attitude'' The Weekend Mix, March 22, 2015) prompted a lot of positive discussion and feedback.
It also got me thinking that we only really scratched the surface of attitude as a topic and that it would be useful to have a closer look and delve a bit deeper.
Attitude can be defined as a general feeling, our manner of thinking or our general disposition.
Often we think of attitude as being on a scale with ''pessimistic'' at one end and ''optimistic'' at the other.
I'm sure we've all classified people around us as being ''glass half-empty or glass half-full'', at one end of the scale or the other.
It is influenced by a lifetime of experiences, our beliefs and values, our self-esteem, physical and mental health, circumstances and situations and our own awareness of how we operate.
Attitude is a life response mechanism, and as I pretty firmly stated in ''Choose your Attitude'' we get to choose what our attitude will be, no matter the situation we find ourselves in, the people we are surrounded by or our general personality.
A healthy attitude allows us to respond to situations in a balanced and even manner giving us some control back, even in unpleasant circumstances. Unfortunately a healthy or positive attitude doesn't mean life won't throw foul things at us; it will.
A healthy attitude does allow us to deal with them in a manner that helps us to be more resilient, preserve our wellbeing and make life more fulfilling long-term.
Now count me in for that!When your attitude is healthy, others are more likely to enjoy being around you and the opportunity to make friends, meet a partner and enjoy a real connection with people is increased.
The short of it is, you are more attractive!We've learned that meaningful connection with others opens up opportunities, leads to us being happier, more fulfilled, healthier and feeling supported when life takes a turn for the worse.
When life does toss muck at us, people with a healthy attitude are more likely to ask ''what happened there?'', ''what can I learn from that?'', ''what worked and what didn't?'', ''what do I need to do to avoid the situation the future?''.
They ask questions, take responsibility for their part in a situation and learn for the future, even though that can be quite challenging and confronting.
The reverse is true for an unhealthy or constantly negative attitude.
The ''bad attitude'' can push people away, personally and professionally; it can build a wall that shuts others out. Life can become solitary and withdrawn.
Those who have an unhealthy attitude are often perceived as angry, selfish and arrogant.
The rub is that often this attitude can mistakenly be used as a protective mechanism for people who are fearful and have low self-esteem.
It creates a vicious cycle.
Jan Aitken is a Dunedin-based life coach.
For more go to www.fitforlifecoaches.co.nz.
