Clinical psychologist Rufus May at the Earthsong community.
Photo by the NZ Herald.
Former psychiatric patient-turned-psychologist Rufus
May has been shaking up the treatment of mental illness by
talking to the voices people hear, reports Chris Barton, of the
NZ Herald.
Rufus May's recovery from delusions - that he was an
apprentice spy for the British secret service with a device
in his chest that was being used to control him - took time.
He was 18 when he was admitted to Hackney psychiatric
hospital in London, diagnosed as schizophrenic and not
allowed to leave.
Initially, he believed he was in a place for burnt-out spies.
"Eventually I thought people are being treated too badly for
it to be a place for burnt-out spies."
Surely burnt-out spies wouldn't be humiliated, degraded and
forcibly medicated - pinned to the floor while their trousers
and underpants were pulled down to their ankles for an
injection in the buttocks with mind-altering drugs?
In the frightening environment he now inhabited, May
developed a scary, maniacal laugh to protect himself from his
fellow inmates.
"I think I was half-expecting to be reunited with my
girlfriend in a safe house because I thought she was a
Russian spy."
May had been getting messages about his mission from the
Bible and the radio. Between the age of 15 and 16 he was a
heavy cannabis user, but he wasn't smoking at 18 when his
troubles began - his first girlfriend left him after a
nine-month relationship.
Instead of becoming depressed, May drifted into a dreamlike
reality, where he was spied upon and felt he had special
spiritual powers. In hospital he still thought he could
communicate with his girlfriend via the Bible. When he
stopped getting messages back, he cried. The dream was over.
"I realised that actually I wasn't that important and that I
was in pyjamas in a psychiatric ward, dribbling. And then I
started to think, 'Well, you're in the pit of society now -
the only way is up'."
Coincidentally Yazz's 1988 pop hit The Only Way Is Up was
playing on the radio.
Over 14 months May was admitted to hospital three times. His
recovery began with going to church.
"I was religious with a capital R, then. I was trying to be a
nicer person. I thought, 'I need to find a way to be of value
to society so they don't lock me up again'."
When he was discharged, he was put on two-weekly injections
for about six months, as an outpatient. He decided to become
a clinical psychologist.
"I transformed, maybe not intentionally, but I found my
mission - to try and change society's approach to mental
health."
In a way he did become a spy.
"For a while I infiltrated mental health services."
A name, residential address, and (preferably residential) telephone number is required from readers who comment on ODT Online. These details will not be visible to site visitors.