Former Dunedin wrestler Craig Miller experienced a gamut of emotions from euphoria to guilt when he learned he was off to the Rio Olympics.
The New Zealand Olympic Committee confirmed the 31-year-old's spot yesterday.
Initially, the Greco-Roman wrestler missed out but a place opened up when Australian Vinod Kumar was suspended for doping violations last week.
"I'm just really champing at the bit to get out there and wrestle but there is a wee bit of guilt to be fair,'' Miller said.
"There are so many good wrestlers around the world but only one per country can go and there are only 19 in my weight.
"A lot of good wrestlers never get this chance, so now it is my responsibility to make the most of the opportunity.''
While Miller feels some guilt in that respect, he certainly feels no sympathy for Kumar.
Miller and Kumar fought at the Africa-Oceania qualifier in Algeria in April. The pair met in the semifinal in what was effectively an elimination bout.
"He had beaten me three weeks earlier but I was pretty confident I could get the win. I gave it a good go ... but he ended up winning on points.''
Miller could have pursued other qualifying options but did not have the resources. He also had his suspicions Kumar might fail a drugs test.
"He went, in three or four months, from being a little bit pudgy to having veins popping out his chest. It was such a big transformation in such a short space of time.
"I used to be 105kg and I'm wrestling in the 66kg class at the Games, so I know about transforming yourself.
"I know how hard it is to get the weight off and to fix yourself up. He did it so rapidly that it made me suspicious.''
The former Kavanagh College pupil tipped the scales at 105kg as a 15-year-old and worked hard to cut the weight over a period of years.
While Miller kept training on the off chance Kumar would fail a test, it was not easy to maintain the intensity. But his motivation is right back where it needs to be now.
"Too right. I still work fulltime but I'm going to the gym every morning and make the most of my weekends.
"I do about six or seven wrestling sessions and a couple of cardio sessions on top of that. I'm going all guns blazing at the moment.''
Miller, who finished seventh at the 2014 Commonwealth Games in the 65kg freestyle, lives in Canberra these days where he works as a personal banker.
It is less than three weeks until the Games get under way and Miller is realistic about what he can achieve.
"I'm not putting too much pressure on myself. But, at the same time, I'm not known to these guys. A lot of these guys I won't have wrestled before and I am a bit unorthodox in terms of Greco-Roman.
"I'm a thrower and I try to pin people a lot. If I get my chance, I've got to take it.
"I'm definitely after a win. I'm not there just to walk out and shake the other guy's hand and get rolled over. I'm there to give it a good bash.''
