I think it was the very odd former Indian cricketer and commentator Navjot Singh Sidhu who came up with the strangest of quotes: ''Statistics are like miniskirts - they reveal more than what they hide.''
Well, we got plenty of statistics from the TAB on the thoroughbred TV programme Weigh In on Monday night, explaining the reasoning for some New Zealand meetings being split between Trackside 1 and Trackside 2.
Don't get me wrong, a lot of it made sense - turnover was up on all three New Zealand meetings last Saturday, with the Timaru harness meeting switching over to Trackside 2 halfway through the programme. I don't have too much of a problem with the Saturday as such - the TAB's plan was always to switch the third-ranked meeting over to Trackside 2. It's a bit awkward that it happens halfway through a meeting, but New Zealand's time zone means there's very little other ''product'' to slide into that gap between midday and 2pm
.... back and forth
Midweek racing, on the other hand, is just a pain. The New Zealand thoroughbred meetings on Thursdays and Fridays have been split, with the first part of the card starting on Trackside 1 before shifting across to 2 to join the Aussie thoroughbreds.
By all reports, the turnover has bounced up as a result, but you have to weigh it up against a factor that can't be measured quite as well - annoying your loyal viewers. Some viewers have gone to record a meeting, only for them to capture just the first half of the card on MySky due to the channel switch.
If it's a two-day meeting between a Friday and a Sunday, you will have to wait until late on a Saturday night to re-record the races you missed on a Friday, as Racing Replay Friday doesn't show until then.
As I say, the turnover figures might be compelling, but maybe - just maybe - it's best to stay in the good books of those who actually provide the horses.
Awards seasons
It's time to put on your thinking caps and come up with nominations for the second annual Smithys, which will be announced in this column in a fortnight.
So far I have three very strong contenders, but would like two or three more humorous awards to hand out. When I say hand out, I mean in a figurative sense. The budget doesn't extend to actual prizes of any tangible shape or size.
Either email them to me on the address below, or have a yarn to me at a race meeting or trials/jumpouts day in the coming days.
Lazy Fiver
Here's a time I could have delved into the stipes' report and rolled out the excuses for the Lazy Fiver. Jaccka Embers copped a check or two at Invercargill on Sunday, but did manage to run on into third, paying $2.50 for the place, so we'll just pocket that and bypass the excuses.
I don't see why the horribly named Ivanskavinskyskvar can't back up his Wingatui win in October with another in race 9 at Cromwell on Sunday.
