By Lauren Keen - Year 13, East Otago High School
The mirror stares back at the girl with the dark hair.
An unwavering image, reflecting her mind's eye.
It holds her self esteem in a tight grip, controlling and manipulating.
As the idea of a typical teenager plagues her thoughts, she can see the flaws in her body.
Is it real? The image she can see? Or is it warped by the standards of a selfie generation?
Her eyes are shrouded by the lens of the mirror.
They argue with her mind, convincing it of what they see.
She is a teenage girl who doesn't fit between the measurements, unable to be forced into society's mould.
Her skin does not glow a soft shade of bronze, the gap between her thighs left years ago.
Her arms are not toned and her stomach falls out of the guidelines set by the girls she follows.
This idea of ''normal'' stares back at her with a silhouette of perfection.
♦ ♦ ♦
When below the standard is normal, how does the boy deal with his achievement?
He glances at his grade and hides the smile.
He is constantly aware of the prying eyes and the comments dancing on the tongues of his peers.
Who set this standard? Where achieving is ridiculed and effort is belittled?
Society.
Aiming desperately for equality, cutting the tall poppies off at the knees to give the rest a chance to catch up.
The students mirror this idea, smothering the whispers of success, using them as a step ladder to remain on top.
The boy sits quietly, waiting. The stares boring into his mind.
He fears that they know, they always do, and he wonders how long it will take for the voices to start.
Sometimes the silence is as deafening as their words.
It builds the tension in the room as an ever-present weight on his mind.
''So ... an excellence, I assume?''
Snickers, jeers and the tension is shattered. The bliss of ignorance lays broken around him.
He closes his eyes and does his best to ignore them.
Holding on to his own goals, he builds the walls back up, deflecting the pointed looks.
He stays in this world of his own, afraid of the standards of the expected, afraid to be himself in a world of judgement.
♦ ♦ ♦
Fear, panic, rising into a strangled scream.
The girl with the golden hair stays silent, holding her emotions in.
Is she angry? Or has the weight of opinions quashed free will, free thinking?
The meeting feels like a trap.
As she is bombarded with expectations, her mind starts to close.
A narrow path appears in front of her, mapped out and decided by others.
The blinkers keep her eyes forward.
When everyone else seems to know what is best for her, how can she say any different?
That hobby will take her nowhere, her passion is useless, she is too good for that career path.
She is starting to believe it, starting to accept her fate.
Expectations of others for their personal gain are being pushed on to her.
She is seen as an opportunity to promote her education, go far in the world and be connected to this small town.
Is she a pawn? Why must her life be influenced by those she is leaving behind?
The expected future of an academic holds her back.
Standards set by others decide her future.
♦ ♦ ♦
The concept of normal holds them to a standard.
A world of people struggling with individuality.
Each in a mind of their own, struggling with the universal benchmark that highlights flaws and insecurities.
When an average is set, the outliers stand out.
Without it, each perspective is relative to another.
Size is just a size and grades are just grades.
When the pressure of expectations are removed, they have no means to condemn.
Insecurities are built on judgement and the feeling of being alone, being the only one who doesn't fit in.
The reality of normal is that they all sit outside the guidelines, deviating from the expected standard, that the synthetic image of perfection cannot ever be achieved.
What purpose does it serve, if not as an axe to cut others down?
When they are all the exception to the rule set by society, none of them are, and the construct of normality implodes.
When they realise this, only then can they be free.
Only then can individuality be accepted.
