Intrusive muzak ruins phoning, cafe culture

Welcome to Monday morning. Or should that be "moaning"? (with apologies to that  English spy dressed as a gendarme attempting to speak French in ‘Allo ‘Allo).

Having a moan is not the most positive way to start the week. But forget all that "what’s right and proper" stuff, put your feet up for a few minutes and find out what’s really getting up people’s noses.

My ramblings last week about how noisy things are these days resonated with some readers. Nancy Durst, who tells me she lives on the border between St Kilda and St Clair, is hot under the collar about the awful music you’re forced to listen to when put on hold. She says insurance companies, the Inland Revenue Department and banks seem to be the worst offenders when it comes to foisting this "elevator music" on innocent callers.

"You might have your own radio or music going while you’re sitting there on the phone, waiting to talk to someone. Why would I want to turn off what I enjoy to listen to that rubbish? I’ve just about been at screaming point with some of these calls.

"I did say to one person, please ask your managers why they think I’d want to listen to that. They often can’t hear it themselves. I’d rather sit in silence or pick up a book and read while I’m waiting."

Good point, Nancy. You should be able to opt out of background music — or be able to choose from a selection while you’re hanging about.

If any of you have suffered listening to any particularly inappropriate or irritating muzak, please share your experiences with the rest of us.

Joan Carter, of Vauxhall, says she has already pleaded in this newspaper for peace at a couple of cafes around Dunedin.

"A recent lunch at a Highgate cafe was marred because my friend could not hear what I was saying. It’s the music with a loud bass beat that is particularly obtrusive.

"Some will turn their music down on request and it is usually met with appreciation by other patrons. Too often I think staff play music of their choice with no heed as to what customers might prefer."

Joan has a very good idea.

She would like readers to nominate cafes and restaurants which serve good food in a "calm atmosphere".

She says the Larnach Castle cafe is one example, with "pleasant background music". Get those nominations rolling in.

More mumbo-jumbo

Mornington’s Max Reid has been collecting pieces of gobbledygook in a special net for some time now. In no particular order, here’s a few gems (pssst, don’t tell General Melchett): "pick the low-hanging fruit", "let’s just park that for now", "draw a line in the sand", "be end-user focused", "take a green-fields approach" allied with "good blue-sky thinking".

Can anyone roll that all into one sentence for me?

Bad driving

"Yes", Marie Harbott, of South Dunedin, says unequivocally, "Dunedin drivers are the worst in New Zealand — maybe in the world."

Marie lived in Sydney for 18 months and uses that as her benchmark for aggressive driving.

"The smaller the population of a place, the worse the drivers are. In a small place they feel they’ve got the freedom to do whatever they want."

Until tomorrow, let’s be careful out there.

- Paul Gorman