Southern has started the season with a bang with consecutive wins over Harbour and Zingari, writes Paul Dwyer.
The wrap
Surprisingly, Harbour gave Southern a run for its money and sounded a bit stiff to say the least. Varsity accounted for Taieri and Green Island with comparative ease. As predicted, we could be looking at the top two finalists right here, right now. Dunedin has won two from two over Green Island and Alhambra Union but not without a lot of difficulty. It just got up late on Wednesday on the back of two penalty tries, unbelievably — certainly, ref Joel Hibbs didn’t pay for a drink in the Sharks clubrooms after the game! Kaik is one from one after accounting for Zingers on Saturday. Zingari, Taieri, AU and GI are yet to register a win but let’s not get carried away; it’s extremely early days. But from what I’ve seen, Green Island and AU are very competitive and Taieri has the draw from hell in week one. Guys, you’ve obviously upset Reggie from the match committee. You must realise you can’t default on his watch as witnessed last year!
Harty’s histrionics
As promised last week, I thought I’d start an in-depth probe into some of Chris Hart’s activities. For those of you who don’t know, Harty is the refs’ boss and also runs by day the two Liquorland franchises in Dunners — Leith St and Andy Bay — and is a sponsor of our club rugby coverage. So as the story goes, a drug-crazed lout was in at Leith Liquor the other week causing mayhem and Donna, who really runs Leith Liquor, suggested he move on. He became abusive and a young tourist came to the rescue and told our mystery assailant to ‘‘pull his head in’’. The assailant then attacks the tourist and a ‘‘melee’’ ensues. It is broken up and the assailant starts to drift off. Donna has called the cops by this stage and Harty, as no surprise to most, is having a ‘‘hotpot’’ at Eureka next door. Our intrepid hero, with ‘‘steak and kidney’’ dripping down his chin, storms out and gives chase to our mystery assailant. He must have been tortoise-like as Harty bought him down with a thunderous tackle just outside the university library. Harty then proceeded to sit on him until the police arrived. The assailant may have a depressed spine and possibly mind as well after the incident. Harty then stormed into the latest metro meeting with his ref’s hat on and, in no uncertain terms, informed them that if all grounds were not roped off for spectators, his refs would be staging a sit-in or a walkout or a pealess whistle. More next week, stay tuned.
Country rugby
So the lights have been switched off in Maniototo until further notice after the Maggots lost the White Horse Cup after holding it for three years. Coach Andrew Hore is wandering aimlessly around Stonehenge listlessly kicking sheep to one side! To rub the salt in, it was lost to old foe Arrowtown, in an absolute thriller to boot. The Maggots missed a drop kick in the final seconds which would have kept hold of it. Ex-Kaik and Otago flanker Adam Hill is coaching the Blue Bulls of Arrowtown this year so congrats to them, and I bet it was a big night in the Burgh. Looks at this early stage Wakatipu, Arrowtown, Cromwell and the Maggots will be vying for the four.
Clutha won by 70 in the South and could go all the way. Looks like the nearest challengers will be Lawrence and Heriot.
North Otago kicks off this weekend and, after a quick glance, it could be the same final as last year with Maheno and Old Boys drawing swords. I hear the North Otago board meeting is looming. I wonder if Colin Jackson will be presenting his ever-lengthening list of talent arriving to prop up the comp this year — the mind boggles. Speaking of Jacko, the word has it he thought he had recruited an All Black front-rower to the area in the form of Ofa Tu’ungafasi and couldn’t believe his luck. As it turns out it was his brother Viliame — close Jacko.
Player numbers
Will do an extensive piece on this next week but premier colts numbers look thinner than ever now with only six clubs having sides. Looks OK only, as Southern has two sides. Junior Colts sides are still being worked out but the numbers are only going one way.
Some other bits
The Alhambra supporters were outraged with the result of the game against Dunedin on Wednesday and to be fair they had some cause. But they were noticeable by their absence at the aftermatch, especially the stalwart Columbs — poor showing, lads. Poor old Wheels and Taity had to carry the can for that. Sharks captain Mark Grieve Dunn was mysteriously absent in the pipe-opener against the Spannerheads last weekend — the word is he was at all three Adele concerts at the weekend. I was chatting to Pete Mirrielees on Saturday about turning out for GI after bleeding Hawks colours for a million years. He lives out at Ocean View and looks after his 2 and 4-year-old daughters at night to take the pressure off at home. So at the Toolbox he can take the girls along to practice during the week and they are royally entertained at the club — nice one, mate.
This weekend
Destroyed Mark Scully last weekend so on to bigger things with the Caped Crusader himself, Harty, so I go two from two. Varsity (13+) is in the Glasshouse hosting the Onion so should win it comfortably. Kaik always beats Dunedin (12-) and it is playing on the High Veldt so take it to the bank. But I can’t pick it.
The Magpies (12-) are at home to the Eels and should rumble easily to three straight. The Hawks (13+) fly to the Toolbox and could cruise especially after the Spannerheads were touched up by Varsity midweek.
The late mail
Jono Nareki, from the Broncos, has made the NZ Colts — outstanding work. He was the best back in the game against the Sharks midweek with his great pace and twinkling feet.
Get your entries for our tipping comp forthwith on rugby.picks@odt.co.nz as it closes next week. The word on the street is there was a clash of the titans between the cantankerous past president and the young bull chairman on Wednesday night out at Shark Park and one stormed out — more next week.
