Babies, bodily functions, birth - TV personality and author Jaquie Brown holds nothing back in her thorough and funny pregnancy guide I'm Not Fat, I'm Pregnant. Here, Brown tells Laura Hewson the story behind the book and what the future holds.
Q Why did you decide to write about your pregnancy?
A It just seemed like a natural thing to do. I really appreciated hearing from friends about what they went through physically and emotionally during their pregnancy and step into motherhood. I liked hearing the truth and not just the medical side of things, so I thought maybe my experience could offer some humour and comfort to other newly pregnant ladies.
Q How is this book different from other pregnancy books?
A It's different probably because I have invested my heart and soul into the book. It's funny and it's honest. I tell a very personal story of my own pregnancy and birth, which I don't think anyone else has done before. The book took me three years to write because it's got up-to-the-minute medical research in it. I selected experts in their fields and went to them with my laptop and interviewed them, transcribed the interviews and then chose the pieces to put into the book.
There is week-by-week information from a nutritionist, midwife, obstetrician and pregnancy exercise specialist. I also interviewed a sex therapist, to talk about how your relationship changes when you are pregnant and a new mum, an acupuncturist, naturopath, fertility expert and lots more. I really wanted to hear from real women and their vastly different experiences of pregnancy too.
So I found women and went to them and interviewed them. I asked about how they got pregnant, how they knew, sex, emotions, bump-touching, body image before and after and of course birth and what it was like during the first few weeks at home with the baby. It's such an interesting subject and I really wanted to treat it with compassion as well as uncover all the secrets that nobody talks about.
Q You were very honest about all the ups and downs of your pregnancy. Was there anything you didn't feel you could share?
A I tried to shield my husband as much as I could. I call him G in the diary even though the book is dedicated to him - it's no secret what his name is. But somehow saying his name every time felt too personal. I was happy to discuss me and my body and everything that I experienced, but felt that he needed to be protected somewhat.
Q What's the reaction to the book been like?
A The reaction has been incredible. I have had such a wonderful response and many women saying they wish it had been around 10 years ago when they were first pregnant. I've had comments from Australia and the UK as well, which makes it all worthwhile. My hope for the book was always for it to reach as many women as possible and to entertain and comfort them during their pregnancy.
Q How did you decide what and who to include?
A I wrote the book as I went through each phase of the process myself. So when we were trying to get pregnant I researched how to get pregnant and interviewed the fertility experts and kept a diary. Then as I went through each trimester I'd learn about various tests and challenges so I'd research them and interview specialists that were appropriate. The women I chose [were] based on their desire to share and be honest and articulate. I chose women who had a point of view and who had different experiences from one another.
I made sure I included a C-section birth, natural birth with no drugs, birth with drugs and a range of other responses to actually being a mum. I also didn't want to leave my readers stranded at the end so interviewed Sharlene Poole, New Zealand's baby whisperer, and she gives tips on how to settle your newborn. As well as this, every mum and dad I interviewed I asked for tips for new mums and dads. So at the end of the book are a list of first-hand tips - very helpful.
Q Your son Leo's birth was far from smooth. How do you feel looking back on that chapter now?
A I look back and I feel numb. I don't really remember being in hospital for a long time - it felt like a few hours when it was two days. I just look at him now and he is so happy and so healthy and energetic, it's hard to believe anything went wrong at the beginning.
Q What are your top-five tips for expectant/new mums?
A 1) Don't work all the way up to your due date. You might be feeling fine now but you will be knocked sideways by emotion and tiredness after the birth and you will need those extra reserves of energy.
2) Be prepared to completely write off the first three months of your baby's life. What I mean by that is just stay home and hunker down. Get to know them and just eat, rest and be present. Don't try to go to cafes and meet people for lunch, it's too much.
3) Don't feel pressured to invite the whole world over to see your baby. Visitors are exhausting and tend to forget that you are tired. Only allow them in the front door if they have food with them and set the egg-timer so they don't out-stay their welcome.
4) Be kind to yourself. Nobody knows what they are doing at first, we all just muddle through the best we can. And as a little postscript to that, try not to compare yourself or your baby to any other new mum or new baby of a similar age. We all parent and develop and recover at different rates.
5) Get some fresh air and sunshine on your face every day and be honest about your feelings. It's OK to ask for help.
Q What's next?
A I have a TV series starting in August on TV1 called Keep Calm & Carry On that follows me in the first six months of becoming a mum - crying, 20kg overweight and all that wonderful stuff! So look out for that! Then I'm just enjoying Leo and seeing what opportunities come up ... until I have baby No2!