There was the motorist who "didn't see the broken yellow lines because they were under the car".
Another - a student - owned a white Toyota Corolla.
"I forget what the ticket was for, but he . . . some black paint and painted UN [United Nations] on his car.
"He said he was applying for diplomatic immunity."
The ruse failed.
Ms Kelly, a Dunedin City Council customer services officer, oversees eight staff who make decisions on whether the 100 or so excuses a week that cross their desks will result in a waived fine.
Some people wrote poetry to staff; generally badly.
The response: "Sorry, but no."
Ms Kelly said there were plenty of misconceptions about what parking behaviour was acceptable, and what was not.
"People think they can't get a ticket if they're in the car and the engine is running."
They can.
Other drivers thought they could stop, for instance, on yellow lines for a moment to drop their children off at school.
They can't.
Nor could they stop on a bus stop if there was no bus coming, or loading zones reserved for goods vehicles if they were not driving a goods vehicle.
But council staff were not without compassion.
A woman whose small car had been picked up by students, then moved from the road on to the footpath and parked illegally in the process, had her ticket waived.
Asked how staff dealt with the many excuses they received, Ms Kelly said while all followed the same guidelines when making a decision, she and customer services agency manager William Robertson were adamant a "human element" was an important aspect of the decision-making.
That is, perhaps, reflected in the percentage of letter-writers who get off their fine - about 50%.
"It's not a formula. It's a human decision," Mr Robertson said.
Staff could not waive a ticket over the phone; any excuses had to be in writing.
And don't try the same excuse too often - council staff do check.
Parking tickets
The rules for getting off:
If you have run out of petrol: Usually, the council will only accept such an excuse if it is accompanied by a petrol receipt coincident with the ticket.
If a hospital appointment has gone over time: Those are decided on a case-by-case basis, "bearing in mind parking round the hospital is difficult to find".
If your pay and display ticket falls off the dashboard: Keep it, and use it for evidence you did pay.
If your vehicle breaks down: Putting a note to that effect in your window does not necessarily mean you will not get a ticket.
Call the council immediately.
