There is sharing their Catholic faith, caring for each other, talking things over and, Mr Howard (93) adds, ''knowing when to speak and when to shut up''.
And there is Mrs Howard's suggestion - separate televisions and decoders.
One set is for Mr Howard's sport, mostly racing and rugby, and the other is for her movies and romantic dramas.
It seems to have worked, as the Oamaru couple today celebrate their 65th wedding anniversary.
Oamaru-born and raised, they were married in St Patrick's Basilica on July 23, 1949 and raised six children - two boys, then twin boys, followed by two girls.
They also have seven grandchildren.
But it might not have reached that point.
They first met at one of the weekly dances, big Saturday night social events in Oamaru, at the Scottish Hall, where many singles courted.
He escorted her home after.
The following weekend, Mr Howard was at a dance at Papakaio after a ploughing event and had his eye on a Georgetown girl, but she had to go home with her parents.
So, he said, he leapt into his Model A Ford and rushed to the Scottish Hall, arriving about 15 minutes before midnight.
Mrs Howard, then Iris Dorwood, was at the door surrounded by three young men.
''I gave her a wave and she pushed them aside,'' Mr Howard chuckled.
And, as it is said, things went from there. They became regular partners at the dances, on some nights followed by a meal at the pie cart in Coquet St.
After they married, the couple lived in Weaver St, then bought a 7ha farmlet at Windsor.
Mr Howard worked for the Waitaki County Council as a grader, then a truck driver for 32 years, moving back to Oamaru in 1976 before he retired in 1986.
They live in a house in Upper Ure St with a ''quarter-acre'' section and both remain active.
Mr Howard has a huge, two-plot vegetable garden, which Mrs Howard (88) also enjoys.
''He gets down there and I can have a bit of peace and quiet,'' she said.
