The wrap
The understrength Eels outlasted a surprisingly competitive Zingari team at Bastion Point.
Varsity crushed a pathetic guppyfish mob (formerly the Sharks) to make the four for the first time this season - and the Sharks look gone.
The Magpies hammered the Spannerheads at the beach and Reggie might claim it as their new home.
The Hawks soared at the high veldt as Kaik tumbled down the ladder after a mid-season renaissance.
The Pirates forwards played the Onion backs and won comfortably, and their season gets better and better.
The disturbing fact is the top four sides - Southern, Harbour, Taieri and Varsity - look markedly better than the rest, and interest-wise the season looks done and dusted until we hit the semifinals.
Other grades
In premier 2, the two unbeaten sides clashed on Saturday and Varsity squeaked home over the Sharks to go top alone and, according to John Burke, record their 27th straight win.
Surely this is some sort of record - Lee Ashton, please investigate. They win the grade.
In premier colts, it was the Magpies and the Makos but the latter have lost three out of four and are gone. Could be a Magpies v Onion final in a mouth-watering clash of Super Coaches Belcher and Columb.
In the Southern Wide schools competition, South Otago is unbeaten, thus logical favourite to take the title, but McGlashan is comfortably second, and these two teams could be in the final.
Are the Otago Boys' seconds really gone?
Country rugby
It's boring at the moment. I'm getting no good stories.
Even the story that keeps on giving - the Central sub-union - is having an incident-free year!
Roxburgh has made the six for the first time but only just over Matak.
It looks like a Maggots v Alex final, with the Maggots too big, too strong.
Same in the South - Clutha is further ahead than Phar Lap - and in the North - Old Boys are playing on their own!
Send me some gossip, lads.
Fifa watch
Back I trudged to the ''nameless'' stadium (the Greenhouse) this week to watch the thunderous showdown between Hungary and Serbia (they used to be one country didn't they?) and what a yawn it was.
The snipers and the thousand officials were still in place and still doubled the crowd numbers.
But I did notice they have taken ''clean stadia'' to new heights.
The rubbish bin signs were covered up and a highly paid official followed you round with a lux just in case you dropped a ''branded'' chip.
I kid you not!
The big news is that Diadie Samassekau and my beloved Mali are into the eight after crushing Ghana - they could go all the way!
More next week on the comical Fifa excesses.
The real goss
So the Magpies had to trek to a real ground (without water, but some sand), Kettle Park, to play the Spannerheads.
There were a couple of trophies up for grabs and even the erstwhile Otago president, ''Big Willis'', from Lawrence (no, they don't have a team and yes, he found the ground), turned up for the festivities back at Bathgate.
He turned up but the Spannerheads didn't - what's going on?
The original Super Coach (Belcher) pretends to work at King's, but his only job is to get the jerseys to the sports teams.
The firsts, with only seconds to go before kickoff, had to resort to inscribing their numbers on bare backs with marker pens as Super Coach failed.
Not sure if he made it in time or not!
''Sneds'', my favourite player, has taken up reffing in his spare time and did the Makos v Onions colts game last Sunday, and to be fair, he did a reasonable job.
I think he's taking it too far, though.
On Saturday, during his game with AU, he starting remonstrating with a spectator who was questioning the referee's parentage.
Sneds, they may be your mates now, but in those terrible uniforms, the refs don't need you defending their honour while you're still playing!
Zingers have come up with a unique Thursday training - if the weather's dodgy, they just go to the Mornington for a meal and a chat.
Stuntman, is it working?
This weekend
Suffered a humiliating loss to Reggie last weekend and the ego is now a squashed prune!
On to Breeny this weekend, so I fear it could be two in a row.
It's Breeny's 100th for Broncos this weekend and he's a genuine good bloke and the Otago pivot this year - good luck, mate.
The Broncos in Breeny's 100th will win but I have to take the Guppy Fish (12-).
The Eels (13+) have a lot of elver back this week, so sorry Kaik.
The Magpies (12-) will just tip over Varsity in the bog for the Cavanagh in the match of the round.
Pirates (13+) will be too big, too strong for Spannerheads, even out at the Toolbox - Hemopo will be a big loss for them.
The Hawks (13+) crush Zingers at the container terminal.
