Namely, understanding that everything in life is temporary.
Every object, every structure, every thought you have is temporary. Every situation you find yourself in, every life event, every emotion you experience is temporary. Nothing is permanent, everything constantly changes and moves on.
"So what," I hear people mumbling?
"What’s important about that?"
Understanding and embracing the concept that all things are temporary is one of the most useful tools you can have in your resilience toolbox. "Why?" you ask.
Let me explain.
When you’re in a hole and life in general sucks or when life is going well and things are ticking along nicely, being able to understand that it will pass can help you to deal with those rough patches better and appreciate the good stuff even more.
As Stephen Guise, author of Mini Habits, says "the idea that everything is temporary ... increases your ability to appreciate and seek progress, while also improving your sense of hope and confidence".
If happiness, suffering, success and failure are temporary, perhaps we could learn to embrace whatever we’re facing because, ultimately, it is all there is. Don’t give the rough times too much weight because they’re temporary. Don’t take the best times for granted because they, too, are temporary. Remember you’ll get through everything and you can’t hang on to anything.
In a nutshell, no matter how happy and satisfying, painful and discouraging, everything and everyone moves on, nothing is permanent.
"This, too, shall pass."Jan Aitken is a Dunedin-based life coach.
For more go to www.fitforlifecoaches.co.nz.
Twitter:@jan -aitken
Photos: Getty Images
This too shall pass
Buddha was travelling through a forest. The day was hot - it was midday - he felt thirsty, so he said to his disciple Ananda, "Go back. We crossed a little stream. You go back and bring, fetch, some water for me."
Ananda went back, but the stream was very small and some carts were passing through it. The water was disturbed and had become dirty. All the dirt that had settled in it had come up, and the water was not drinkable now. So Ananda thought, "I shall have to go back."
He came back and he said to Buddha, "That water has become absolutely dirty and it is not drinkable. Allow me to go ahead. I know there is a river just a few miles away from here. I will go and fetch water from there."
Buddha said, "No! You go back to the same stream."
As Buddha had said this Ananda had to follow it, but he followed it with half a heart as he knew that the water would not be brought. And time was being unnecessarily wasted and he was feeling thirsty, but when Buddha said it he had to go.
Again he came back and he said, "Why did you insist? That water is not drinkable."
Buddha said, "You go again." And as Buddha said it, Ananda had to follow.
The third time he reached the stream, the water was as clear as it had ever been. The dust had flowed away, the dead leaves had gone, and the water was pure again. Then Ananda laughed. He brought the water and he came dancing. He fell at Buddha’s feet and he said, "Your ways of teaching are miraculous. You have taught me a great lesson - that just patience is needed and nothing is permanent."
- "This too shall pass", from The Book of Secrets, by Osho.
The good times and the bad
• Help you appreciate them more
It’s easy to take things for granted, or assume you will always have them. When things are going well what often happens is you become used to the good stuff and assume it will be permanent. You become "habituated" to it. The mindset of permanence can really set you up for experiencing pain when the good times come to an end. By understanding that everything is temporary, you can capitalise on the importance and impact of the good things you experience. With the "all things are temporary" mindset you’re likely to become more thankful the longer it lasts.
• Help keep you growing, personally and professionally
When you assume, or expect, that something is permanent, you’re more likely to relax a bit and even rest on your laurels. However, by understanding that it’s likely to be temporary you have every reason to keep setting yourself up for success, quietly working away to achieve the things you want and increasing your satisfaction and happiness levels.
• Allow you to experience hope
Life throws curve balls at all of us at one time or another. You may be at rock bottom, but it will pass. That doesn’t mean that you’ll like all the options facing you or that it won’t take some effort on your behalf to help shift things along, but it will pass. There is something else following.
• Give you confidence to try again
Thomas Edison is said to have tried close to 10,000 different light bulbs before finding a commercially viable one. He knew that "failure" was temporary and he continued to take calculated risks to get to where he wanted. There is no failure, only feedback. Try again, the past doesn’t necessarily dictate the future.
