It was just one incident which featured in 29-year-old Nicholas Gavin Loper’s ongoing pattern of severe domestic violence from 2019, the Dunedin District Court heard yesterday.
Judge Emma Smith jailed him for 29 months on two charges of strangulation, two of assault in a family relationship and one of injuring with reckless disregard.
The victim read a statement describing how her life had been permanently altered.
"You were so calculated you learned ways to strangle me without leaving bruises.
"Every time you said you hoped I’d die, I truly believed you ... There were times when I truly wished you would end my life."
She was now unable to work a full week because of her neck pain and would never compete in her chosen sport again.
"I can never get the last seven years of my life back."
On March 9, 2020, the couple clashed over the sale of a fridge.
When the woman would not hand over the money, Loper threw her to the ground and held her down by forcing his weight on to her throat.
Court documents described how he only relented once he got the cash.
Just days later Loper’s rage erupted again when he saw the victim folding his laundry.
He grabbed her by the neck and pinned her against the wall before throwing her down and slamming her head against the floor.
The woman ran away from the house but returned 20 minutes later to find her clothes in the hallway.
When she confronted Loper, he pushed her into a wall, inflicting another blow to her head.
The court heard the habitual violence continued through 2020.
On one occasion Loper became angry because he believed the victim had not shown him enough affection when his family had visited.
He pushed her on to a woodpile, causing a fracture to her vertebra.
"The victim was unable to move for about 20 minutes to one hour. She asked the defendant to call for an ambulance, but he refused and ignored her," a summary of facts said.
The couple stayed in Christchurch for the holidays and on Christmas Eve Loper again strangled his partner, "to the point where the victim thought she was going to die".
She had to wear a scarf the next day to hide her injuries from family.
"I can’t believe you [crying sad emoji], you’re going to kill me Nick please," the victim messaged.
"I really hope so one day," Loper responded.
"That would be the best gift you’ve given me."
In July 2021 — three months before a police investigation commenced — Loper chased the victim around the house until he caught her and dragged her to the floor.
He put his hands over her nose and mouth as she fought for breath.
During the incident the woman’s phone was activated and recorded it.
Loper ceased the attack and demanded to see the phone but the victim locked the screen.
He threw it at her as he left the room.
At a restorative justice meeting, Loper said it had been easy to turn to violence when he was feeling financial stress.
He admitted he felt no guilt or empathy for his victim at the time of the woodpile incident.
"Having control of her made you feel like you had some control over your life," Judge Smith said.
Loper, who had no previous convictions, had been "cruel and demeaning".
The judge granted a protection order in favour of the victim.
