MPs behaving badly: melodrama, monkeys and clowns

Peter Dunne
Peter Dunne
United Future leader Peter Dunne has given up on his annual list of worst-behaved MPs, saying Speaker Lockwood Smith's reign has ushered in a new era of dignity and propriety.

However, The New Zealand Herald was not so sure, and its own trawl through the Hansard record for Question Time, the most volatile time of the day, found that while few MPs were kicked out of the Chamber in the past year, the insults still came thick and fast.

Mr Dunne did honour Labour's Trevor Mallard with a lifetime achievement award in bad behaviour "for services to melodrama, fisticuffs, and generally aberrant behaviour".

However, he said otherwise bad behaviour, judged on MPs being told to withdraw and apologise for insulting others, had "virtually dried up".

The Herald found the usual culprits of unparliamentary behaviour - accusations of lying and hypocrisy by other MPs - abound.

MPs also added to the repertoire by giving colourful insults and then having to apologise.

They included Labour MP Shane Jones saying of Gerry Brownlee that "the notion of him and energy is a mathematical impossibility".

Labour's Moana Mackey apologised for referring to Hekia Parata as "Lady Parata" and "her royal highness".

National's Paul Quinn was pulled up for calling Labour's backbench "monkeys".

Prime Minister John Key and Labour leader Phil Goff were each ordered to apologise to the other for implying they were lying.

Mr Key also had to withdraw other insults, albeit unrepentantly, including his nicknames for Mr Goff as "Whack it on the bill Phil" and "Phil who cried wolf" on the grounds the proper title was "Hon Phil Goff".

He also had to apologise for implying Mr Goff was "a racist".

Labour MP David Cunliffe delivered a mock apology to Finance Minister Bill English for calling him "a star" in his appearance in a TVNZ7 promotion.

It drew the retort from Mr English that he was actually flattered by Mr Cunliffe's use of the word "because in my understanding that is a description he usually only applies to himself".

Ironically, it was the Speaker himself who said "I apologise" more than any other MP at least 85 times in Question Time alone.

While none were forced apologies, he did apologise for his own sins, including suggesting Labour MP David Parker "engaged the brain before operating the mouth".

But mostly, he apologised for others' sins.

He apologised to Mr Mallard frequently including for "mis-handling" an accusation by Mr Mallard that Paula Bennett had made a two-fingered gesture when in fact she had not.

Once he apologised for Mr Mallard, saying sorry to Anne Tolley after Mr Mallard called out "What a clown!".

He apologised for not intervening in time to stop insults being delivered including Mr Key's reference to Shane Jones as "the real leader of the Labour Party" and letting things "head down the path to disorder".

He apologised for his difficulty hearing when he had the flu, for having to interrupt MPs in order to scold them and for rules they did not like.

While, in general, there was less rambunctiousness in Parliament, outside Parliament it was a different story.

There were at least two grand apologies for general misbehaviour from Act leader Rodney Hide about his use of travel perks to take his girlfriend on overseas jaunts and Hone Harawira for his well known "white mofo" comments.

Another in the role of honour outside the walls included Tau Henare calling Mr Hide a "buffoon" and a "jerk-off" for saying he would resign rather than allow Maori seats on the Super City council.

- Claire Trevett

Add a Comment