As on the Monopoly board where the square marked "Free Parking" is a place of salvation, so it is, or was, in our main thoroughfare of George St.
Where once we delighted in the charm of being able to park momentarily, conveniently, freely in our bustling metropolis we are now subjected to the crass and opportunist imposition of a money-making parking department.
An exploration into the economies of this rort shows that there are 31 car parking spaces between Frederick St and the Octagon.
At full screw these can provide a gross income of $261,144 per annum.
After cost of 33%, as provided by the Dunedin City Council, the net income is $172,553 per annum if every single meter is being fed every single minute of the chargeable time throughout every week of the year.
This figure is academic anyway as the then chairman of the parking strategy committee stated that the parking changes were not revenue-motivated.
The desecration of the soul of our town centre was foisted upon us by a bureaucracy which decided it knew best.
As it transpires, it has altered the fabric of our unique town centre in a mercenary way.
George St affects every single resident in our city. It is everybody's main street. It is the spiritual centre of collectiveness.
When it had free parking of five, 10 and 30-minute spaces it said "Dunedin, we live in a friendly, fair, charming, unique manner".
We don't care how much people pay to park in the main street of Sydney. In our town we enjoy the convenience and civility that comes with free parking in the main street.
The reasons forwarded as the case for paid parking were, frankly, nonsense.
That people were parking all day was plainly untrue and indeed if such a happening was occurring then the parking officers were not doing their job properly.
The other justifying reason purported that people were supposedly driving around the block waiting for a park to come available, choking the main street traffic, is equally spurious.
We need to recapture the charm that the free parking provided us and the environ.
The constant turnover of parking spaces provided great convenience to the citizens and also was of comfort to the ratepaying retailers.
We have had more than a year to experience the new regime and most people would have found that the paid version is far inferior to the previous free version.
And that comes as no surprise. Common sense, really.
The free parking issue should be seen as a demand that the citizens of our town make of the bureaucracy.
We prefer free parking in George St.
We don't need City Hall telling us that paid parking is better, fairer and more convenient than free parking.
We have experienced both and we want to return to how it was.
But as citizens we do not need to march to the steps, or is it to the locked gates, of the ivory tower pleading with bureaucrats for common sense, compassion and equity.
There is a better way. The upcoming election allows the electorate to inquire of the candidates of their preparedness to allow George St to revert to free parking.
The question we are asking the candidates is: "Do you support trying to recapture the charm, uniqueness and convenience that the free parking provided".
Simple, straightforward, unambiguous question which they take a position on.
Should the candidates who support this parking position ultimately be successful then, if in the majority, they can instruct the bureaucracy to remedy the vulgar impost that is now in pace.
It is an intriguing issue. Not only is it positive to all citizens in that it provides them with a preferred outcome, but it also sends the message to the killjoys in City Hall that it is their job to make us happy, not our job to make them happy.
Running this town is not all about them. It will be a given that the bureaucrats will obfuscate the issue.
"We need to consult, to be seen as acting transparently" they will cry.
This is bollocks. They choose to consult when it suits them.
But it is also bollocks because in this instance consultation is not required.
There would be little or no opposition to the change back to free parking.
Consultation would only keep employed those whose job it is to run such consultations.
Give Dunedin back its soul. Give us citizens something back.
Candidates, prepare yourselves to take a position on this issue.
Ask yourselves the question, "Do I stand for office wishing to make decisions that are best for the citizens of Dunedin or am I to be directed by the minions of City Hall?"
