• Shield thoughts . . .
So the big day has arrived.
Many things have changed since Southland last played Otago for the Ranfurly Shield in Invercargill - it has been 63 years, after all - but one thing has not.
Otago still wants to get its hands on the shield.
Correction: Otago NEEDS to get its hands on the shield.
An old sparring partner of mine believes an unexpected victory will simply paper over the cracks in Otago rugby.
Perhaps he's right. But, as the first small step in repairing a run-down rugby province, you could do a lot worse than winning the Earl of Ranfurly's lovely log.
Southland starts as the deserved favourite. The Stags are experienced, talented, tough and at home, and all their success in recent years has been well-earned.
Otago is in a deep rut, is coming off one of its worst performances in recent memory and does not seem to have much spark, nous or genuine class.
But . . .
But . . .
Why do I think there is a chance of an upset?
Point one: the weather. You just know it's going to be freezing, and cold hands can make the game a lottery.
Point two: it's Otago versus Southland, and it's been a long time since a game between the two southern rivals was lopsided.
Of the last 10 southern derbies, eight have been decided by seven or fewer points. There have been two one-point margins.
And when a game is traditionally close, it could be a lucky break, a bad bounce, a poor call or a single moment of sheer inspiration that proves the difference.
• ...ahead of...
Here are six other reasons to be hopeful Otago is going to win the Ranfurly Shield:
1. Otago can't play worse than it did last week. This is a serious reason. That performance against Counties-Manukau was putrid.
2. Otago was just playing possum against Counties. Genius. Pretend to be incompetent, then sneak up on the Stags.
3. Great things happen every 53 years. In 1957, Otago won the Ranfurly Shield. In 1904, Cy Young pitched the first perfect game in the modern baseball era. In 1851, The New York Times was founded. In 1798, the Wordsworth/Coleridge poetry collection Lyrical Ballads was published. In 1745, the first recorded women's cricket game took place. Spooky.
4. Great things happen on August 7. Macbeth was performed for the first time (1606). The Peace Bridge linking Ontario and New York was officially opened (1927). Ivory Coast gained independence (1960). Abebe Bikila (1932), Greg Chappell (1948), David Duchovny (1960) and Charlize Theron (1975) were born. Spooky.
5. Otago was also beaten by Counties in Pukekohe in 1991. And went on to win the national championship for the first time.
6. I just read this line in a book: If you are prepared to let people walk over you, get used to life as a carpet. Now that's good motivation. You are Otago. Stand up and fight.
• ...the big game
Will it feel a little like spoiling a fairy tale if - IF - Otago swoops down and takes the shield off Southland?
Possibly.
But let's hope the respect that runs side by side with the desire to give the other team a good whupping leads to as few uncomfortably tense moments as possible.
As a pre-emptive strike, let me assure the guy who threw me a magnificent party 10 years ago, the wonderful woman who helped me survive two awful years at teachers' college, my favourite netball media liaison and, especially, my Southland equivalent, of two things:
- There will be no gloating if Otago wins.
- I will eventually speak to you again if Southland wins.
• Partying with the king
The American media has been buzzing after a sensational, salacious story about the high life of basketball star LeBron James.
The story, written by a reporter hanging out with James and his entourage at a club, was pulled by the ESPN website just minutes after being posted.
It includes some eye-opening details about the lifestyle of The Chosen One, who made such a dramatic televised decision to switch to the Miami Heat.
The highlights:
- Five security guards were stationed around James at all times.
- Near his seat was a bathtub containing two naked women and a bunch of rose petals.
- A waiter FLEW, on some sort of wire, down to the posse to deliver bottles of champagne.
And they say millions of dollars can ruin a young man.
• Brotherly love
How 'bout those Bryan brothers?
Bob and Mike Bryan set a mark this week when they won their 62nd professional tennis doubles title in their 100th final.
It moved them past the record of 61 they previously shared with the Woodies, Australia's Todd Woodbridge and Mark Woodforde.
The chest-bumping 32-year-old twins had, fittingly, about 25 family members on hand to witness the moment.
