Greymouth: 'Like being trapped in a Coldplay video'

Greymouth is "a living museum of misery" the Facebook post says. Photo: Wikipedia
Greymouth is "a living museum of misery" the Facebook post says. Photo: Wikipedia
Just a few days after a Stuff article talked about 'the fall of Greymouth', the town has featured on the satirical Facebook page 'Sh** Towns of New Zealand'.

Westport has previously featured, where it was dubbed Methport.

Last year, the page listed Cromwell as one of the top 5 worst towns, describing the Central Otago town as the "Mistake on the Lake" and the "Toilet Bowl of the South".

Even upmarket Waiheke Island has appeared, and Nelson.

"With incessant rainfall, a permanent plague of sandflies and a parade of boarded-up shops and bankrupt polytechs, the town is a living museum of misery," the page said of Greymouth.

"Its perpetual gloom would make it the perfect setting for a moody Scandinavian crime drama, except nothing of any interest happens there."

"If you spent more than a day in the town you may feel like you were trapped in a Coldplay music video.

"Even Greymouth's name is depressing  - it sounds like Victorian slang for a particularly nasty venereal disease caught from making out with lepers, making it the West Coast's second worst placename after Blackball.

"The main industries in Greymouth are digging stuff out of the ground, complaining about not being allowed to dig stuff out of the ground, and cutting down primeval forests so they can be turned into coffee tables. Greymouth: The Huntly of the south."

While many readers were quick to defend Greymouth and slammed the writers, many took it for the satirical piece it was.


"Ahhhh Greyhole as we fondly call it in Westport ... But hey, they have a better hospital than ours!! It's ok for a day trip for some quick surgery, maccas and the warewhare. I had my babies there too."

"One of the few places in NZ where you can have a town meeting and family reunion at the same time."

"Love Greymouth. Better than Methport (Westport)."

- By Laura Mills

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