At 2.20am on Wednesday, two police officers arrived at Donald Coulter's Milton home to tell him his daughter Rebecca (6) and ex-wife Phillipa "Pip" Manning (43) had died at the scene of a car crash, and his daughter Abigail (3) had been airlifted to Dunedin Hospital.
"It is anyone's worst nightmare."
Yesterday, the family invited the Otago Daily Times inside their home to share their story.
"I thank my lucky stars I still have one [daughter]. I still wish I had two," he said.
He had not slept since the accident and spent little time apart from Abigail, who cried for her father as soon as they were separated.
"I have had one taken ... I am not having another."
Abigail, who turned 3 on Wednesday, was in a carseat behind the front passenger seat when the southbound Mazda station wagon, driven by her mother, and a northbound truck-and-trailer unit collided, 4km south of Milton on State Highway 1, at 9.35pm on Tuesday.
"I didn't want them to hear it from anyone else."
He said the accident happened on his mother's birthday. She often took care of her grandchildren.
Mr Coulter said he was amazed by the support from the wider community, and the "amazing" support offered by his employer, Milburn Lime.
After reading yesterday's ODT, he contacted Mainfreight to arrange a meeting with the "poor bastard" truck driver involved in the crash.
"I have to meet ... him, because if I don't, imagine how he is going to go through life."
He understood the driver, who was in his 20s, was devastated by the accident, and the family were keen for him to have closure.
The family also joined police in calling the actions of a passing Northern Southland Transport truck driver "heroic", after the Invercargill-based man rescued Abigail from the burning car.
"I want to meet this fellow as well, so he can meet Abigail in a different circumstance."
He had not yet worked out how to tell Abigail about the accident, but planned to save newspaper clippings to show her at a later date.
The family expressed their sadness at losing Ms Manning, who worked as radiographer with Dunedin-based Otago Radiology. Her parents are visiting from the United Kingdom.
Mr Coulter said the pair met on the Falkland Islands and people there, including his two sons from a previous relationship, were devastated.
Rebecca, who was born premature weighing just two and a-half pounds (1.13kg), spent the first three months of her life in the neonatal intensive-care unit at Dunedin Hospital. She was a "fighter", he said.
"She was a loving child. She had so much to live for."
He was grateful he had honoured a promise and taken "my girls" on their first camping trip, through Twizel, Cromwell and Lumsden just three weeks ago.
"Becs just wanted to catch a fish."
He was impressed when she helped reel in a brown trout.
He described Rebecca as an animal lover, who was excited about owning an as-yet-unnamed pup, and getting a white horse for her seventh birthday.
"The countdown started from when she was 4 years old."
The family were now looking for white horses and possibly a cart to send off their beloved little girl at her joint funeral.
On Wednesday night, when Rebecca's grandmother, aunt and cousins visited the crash scene, they saw three white horses in a neighbouring paddock.
"I want her to have her last trip on a horse, because that is only fitting," Mr Coulter said.
• If you have a white horse you could offer for the funeral, please email reporters@odt.co.nz
