There are two comparisons between our court sittings at the beginning of 1909 and the beginning of 2009.

The first is that our modern courts don't crank into action for at least two weeks but provide JPs to adjourn without plea case after case allowing villains to escape summary justice, apply for legal aid and dream up grotty pleas in mitigation in their home towns far away from their disorder and mayhem.

The second difference is that the "crime" of early 1909 seems paltry beside the reported crime of this year.

A police officer faced a chainsaw wielding father aided by two sons with baseball bats, a strawberry seller up North was robbed at gunpoint, a brawl in the Octagon involved 30 people, a Henderson man savagely set his dogs on party-goers and a Wellington man armed with a large knife robbed a pharmacy demanding morphine.

But in 1909 in Dunedin the court started for business on Monday, January 4 when justice of the peace J. B. Taverner had to deal with one Tom Flynn for, not one, but two charges of bigamy.

You get a taste for these things.

He was remanded for later sentencing.

The same day, the Otago Daily Times published the minor crime statistics for all of 1908 in Dunedin.

Drunkenness (668)
Common assault (42)
Assaults on police (8)
Breaches of the peace (33)
Burglary (17)
Wife desertion (78)
Disorderly conduct (10)
False pretences (13)
Indecent behaviour (23)
Opium smoking (5)
Sly grogging (6)

The same day, Joseph Keogh was fined 10 shillings for driving his vehicle on the wrong side of George St and Ross Stevens received the same penalty for driving his vehicle across the intersection of George St and Moray Pl "at greater than a walking pace".

William Sheehan was fined 10 shillings for "leaving a vehicle unattended" and Bill Hattie was fined 3 for obscene language.

A Mr Hornby was remanded on a charge of theft and Charlie Pellows and George Benfell were fined 10 shillings for "exploding fireworks in a public place".

The next day, one Hoo Gee pleaded guilty to receiving into his care an infant without being properly licensed to do so and was remanded for sentence.

Mr Ah Hung was fined 25 for his third offence of smoking opium.

On Wednesday, January 13, 1909, the ODT reports that Mr E. C. Cutten, Stipendiary Magistrate, was sitting in the civil court presiding over a nice case of rhubarb.

John Major was suing Moritzon & Co for not receiving his rhubarb.

Apparently, Mr Major had bid successfully for it at Moritzon's auction rooms but they had lost his rhubarb and he wanted it.

The magistrate made up his mind on the spot.

Judgement for the plaintiff in the sum of four shillings and eight pence.

Almost 100 years to the day, this newspaper reports a story under the headline "War declared on Chilean rhubarb" but I suppose this does not prove a journalistic obsession with this favourite vegetable.

On January 14, Mr Cutten S. M. had moved on from rhubarb and had to deal with Kate Maynard for "keeping a house of ill repute" during December 1908 and January 1909.

She successfully persuaded the court that she was going to move up to live with her father in Oamaru so she was fined only 10.

And then the Beak moved into what was known as the Juvenile Court where he "committed an infant, whose mother was in indigent circumstances, to the Industrial School at Caversham", but he ordered the mother to pay two shillings and sixpence per week and "the child to be brought up in the Presbyterian form of religion".

If that wasn't enough, he had to sentence a cell full of drunks before going home for the night.

Refreshed the next morning, the same magistrate was faced with a case, delightfully headed up in the ODT as "An Unfortunate".

It was the story of Alice Banning, who was charged with drunkenness and performing a grossly indecent act in Victoria Rd not far from where the Beach Hotel stands today.

She was discharged on the drunkenness offence but sentenced to three months' imprisonment on the indecent act.

I can report the court no better than the court reporter reported at the time Accused (wailing): "Oh don't say that".

The magistrate went on to say that the sentence would be suspended on the understanding that the accused remained for six months in the Mount Magdala Home (a home for unfortunates).

Accused: "No! I won't go. I won't go."

"She was removed, protesting loudly, declaring that she wanted to go to prison rather than to the home. The woman's sobs and protests filled the whole building until she was finally removed to the lock-up."

On a more mundane level, Joe Braithwaite was fined 10 shillings for "encumbering Princes St with packing cases and the magistrate felt compelled to intone, "It is an offence to unpack cases in the street under any circumstances".

Getting up a head of steam, he then put away Mary Jane Barry, described by His Worship as a "very old offender", for 14 days for breaking 26 windows.

The next day the learned magistrate had a rest and handed his court over to a justice of the peace who dealt with some misdemeanours.

Morris Mannheim was fined five shillings for drunkenness.

He had 13 previous convictions.

But his record was broken by the next defendant, George Pigott, with 26 previous convictions, but George was fined the same amount.

Next up, an unnamed defendant was fined two shillings and sixpence for allowing cattle to wander in Northeast Valley, Joe Cox was fined the same amount for allowing his horse to wander in the Town Belt and Jas Taylor also received the same for allowing several horses to "wander near the Oval".

The rural fraternity was surely getting its beans that morning.

All in all, a varied week for our local courts in the first week of 1909.

Michael Guest is a former lawyer and District and Family Court Judge