MONDAY
A terrible day in the history of this great nation. I took one of the Pomeranians for a walk in the park — and saw a man wearing a turban.
Dogs sense danger. They can smell it. It went crazy at the sight of him, and did its business on the path. I kept walking to get away from the evil Sikh but he called out, ‘‘Are you going to pick that up, mate?’’
Unbelievable. They come here, and think they can push us around.
He caught up with me, and said, ‘‘Families come here. Kids, you know? They don’t want to have to see that.’’
I said, ‘‘Don’t hurt me.’’
He said, ‘‘I’m not going to hurt you. Just pick it up, OK?’’
I bent down and scooped it up in a plastic bag, and put it in a nearby bin.
‘‘Good on you, mate,’’ he said.
So this is what it’s come to. I want New Zealand to stay New Zealand, but New Zealand is not New Zealand any more. It’s been Indianised.
Sikhs need to be purged. Something has to be done about it.
I sat down in the basement and fondled my firearms.
TUESDAY
The police came to the house and took away my firearms. Of course it was politically motivated. The government is feeling the heat, and they don’t like it.
Taking my guns is an abuse of my rights as a New Zealand citizen. But every crisis is an opportunity, and I waited for the media to call so I can spread the message that we need to protect our borders.
Soon enough I was invited to talk to Ryan Bridge tomorrow on his Herald Now breakfast programme. Good. He’s a straight shooter and an advocate of free speech, and will welcome the fact I want to have a public conversation about it.
WEDNESDAY
I said to Ryan, ‘‘I want to have a public conversation about it.’’
He said, ‘‘Well, do you know what? You’ve got one.’’
And then he said, ‘‘Brian, you’re not making sense.’’
He also said, ‘‘You’re sounding crazy.’’
And later, ‘‘I’m sorry, but that sounds insane.’’
When it came to the issue of owning firearms, he said, ‘‘You’re not sounding like a fit and proper person.’’
And this is part of the problem, isn’t it? That to have your firearms, you’ve got to be a fit and proper person.
‘‘And you’re sounding a bit nuts.’’
I tried to raise one last point, but he said, ‘‘I don’t want to know what you think because we’re done now.’’
I felt the heat. It didn’t feel very good.
THURSDAY
Fortunately a bit of balance today, thanks to free speech advocate Heather du Plessis-Allan, who said on Newstalk ZB, ‘‘I don’t like seeing what looks like the police being pressured by politicians. So they’ve found the guns and they’re taking the guns away. On principle, I’m very uncomfortable with all of that.’’
At last, someone who is not afraid to speak the truth.
FRIDAY
Jesus collected guns. He liked nothing better than to get together with the bros and go hunting. The bros all admired him and said he was the best shot ever, a real marksman.
But Jesus took it all in his stride, and said, ‘‘Remember that time I took down that big old Himalayan bull? Weighed damn near 100kg. The wind was blowing in the mountains and the snow was hard. I climbed up roughly 1500 metres, shot the beast, strapped it to my back, and came down with it in the dark. Everyone was like, ‘Oh, man, now I’ve seen everything!’ They were happy days.’’
‘‘Brian,’’ Hannah shouted down from the top of the stairs, ‘‘what are you doing down in the basement?’’
