There is often some effort required to maintain a positive state of mind, but the benefits are worth it, writes Jan Aitken.
I don’t know if this happens to you: you will be talking to someone, reading, listening to the radio, on your computer or watching television and you notice the same or similar themes coming from different sources.
When it happens to me, I stop and take notice. I figure there is something there I need to be aware of, something that perhaps I need to learn or at the very least something I need to take notice of. Maybe that’s fanciful, maybe it’s not. Either way, I use it as a personal beacon to get me to pay attention and to take a closer look.
It happened to me last Sunday. I kept coming across people who were talking about looking beyond the negative things happening around us, locally and globally, and looking at what we had to be grateful for.
In fact one friend set it as a challenge for the week: to look closely at what in my world was good.
On the whole, I’m a fairly positive individual. I thought "sweet, simply done". In fact so easy was the task, I thought, that while whistling Monty Python’s Always look on the bright side of life, I challenged the Fit for Life Facebook followers to spend Monday — all 24 hours of it — without making a single negative comment. I lasted 3 hours and 5 minutes, and at 9.05am I had to reset and start again!
Like a moth attracted to the light, we seem to be attracted towards negative thinking and negative news.
Next time someone makes a negative comment, take note of what happens. Often if one person starts, then lots of us will pile in with similar comments. But why are we so drawn towards the negative?
It seems we are born with what is known as a "negativity bias". Our great capacity to absorb negative input probably evolved in order to keep us out of harm’s way; our survival depended on it. We had to be acutely aware of any potential dangers in order to avoid them.
Not a bad system really, that supersensitive negativity enhancer. Not bad for avoiding a sabre-tooth tiger or someone coming up behind us wielding a club. It’s just that we don’t have too many of those sorts of threats in our daily lives anymore. So, although we don’t use the bias to avoid wild animals it is still active in all the other spheres of our daily lives.
Research has shown that a negative perspective is more "contagious" than a positive one. Analysis tells us that there are more negative emotional words (62%) than positive ones (32%) in the English language.
It’s also been shown that two-thirds of the neurons in the amagdyla are used to detect negative experiences. Once the brain starts looking for and focusing on bad news it’s stored into long-term memory extremely quickly; after all, you don’t want to forget about that sabre-tooth stalking you.
On the other side of the equation positive experiences need to be consciously held in our awareness for around 12 seconds (doesn’t sound long but try timing it) in order to be transferred from short-term to long-term memory.
No wonder Dr Rick Hanson, a notable psychologist and author, commented "the brain is like Velcro for negative experiences but Teflon for positive ones".
That just got me thinking even more: Why even bother looking for the positive in the first place? Why make the effort to think about the good around us if that’s how we’re wired?
Seems to me there are benefits to be had from looking on the bright side. Researchers continue to explore the effects of positive thinking and optimism on health. Benefits include:
• living longer
• lower rates of depression
• lower levels of stress and distress
• stronger immune system
• better overall psychological and physical well-being
• better cardiovascular health and reduced risk of death from cardiovascular disease
• better coping skills during hardships and times of stress
• higher levels of satisfaction with life in general
• higher levels of gratitude.
Even more straightforward than any of the above is that acknowledging the positives simply gives you a nice feeling. It helps you to appreciate what you have. That, in turn, helps you to feel better and see the positives. It is an upward spiral.
It is known that because our brains are "Velcro for negative experiences" we need more positives than negatives to balance it all out. In fact we need a ratio of five positives to one negative. The size of the positive experience isn’t important, simple, small, regular positive experiences tip the scales towards happiness.
I’ll leave you with a song written in 1944. It’s been recorded more times than I can poke a stick at and by some really big names, Bing Crosby, Paul McCartney, Aretha Franklin are just three. It has even been used by Disney. It sums things up quite nicely, I think ...
You’ve got to accentuate the positive
Eliminate the negative
Latch on to the affirmative
Don’t mess with Mister In-Between
You’ve got to spread joy up to the maximum
Bring gloom down to the minimum
Have faith or pandemonium
Liable to walk upon the scene
— Accentuate the Positive, by Johnny Mercer and Harold Arlen, 1944.
- Jan Aitken is a Dunedin-based life coach.
For more go to www.fitforlifecoaches.co.nz.
Twitter:@jan—aitken
