It is not as awkward as it sounds - it was just Teaz' way of combining his new-found love of commentating with burning off energy around his parents' property at Ohaupo, in the Waikato, more than 20 years ago.
''I used to ride my bike around the house with one of those cattle-herding sticks,'' he said.
''I would ride around and commentate a field on a piece of paper, and I used to do that for days on end.
''I was 5 or 6 and did it all the way up until 10 or 11 years old. Then my brother got big enough to come out and race, too, and I'd commentate the both of us on our bikes.
''It just went from there, on anything that moved, really.''
Teaz (29) arrived in Dunedin on Monday afternoon to begin his new job for the New Zealand Racing Board calling thoroughbreds, harness racing and greyhounds in Otago, along with some commitments on the West Coast circuit over Christmas.
He makes his southern debut at Forbury Park tonight after blowing out the cobwebs at the Cambridge harness on Sunday.
''The big thing is getting out of calling them like trials and getting back into calling them like races,'' he said.
''The first race I did the other day, I struggled in that respect. Afterwards, I started calling them like races and it sounded a lot better.''
Teaz called harness trials and workouts at Pukekohe, Alexandra Park and Kumeu for the past seven years after his early beginnings at the Cambridge workouts.
He was lucky enough to receive early support from Waikato commentator George Simon and former northern caller Alby Gain as his ambitions gained momentum.
''I started doing a few galloping trials through George, then Alby took me under his wing when I was 16 or 17. Back then he controlled a lot of the days and he'd say, `I'm not doing the Avondale trials ... you come and do them.''
'More recently, Teaz has mixed his job working for his parents' scrap metal business with training a team of trotters and pacers at Ohaupo with wife Megan.
He admits it will be tough watching the team racing from afar, particularly as stable star Mingara will line up in the group 3 Northern Trotting Breeders Stakes at Alexandra Park on December 13 - the same night as a Forbury Park meeting.
''It'll be tough watching it in the commentary box,'' he said.
''The team is going the best ever so it's pretty hard to walk away, but Megan is doing a good job. She does the work. She's better at it than I am, so they couldn't be in better hands.''
Teaz has a family background in racing. His father, Basil, trained gallopers for 40 years.
''I grew up with it and went to the races. When I was too big to become a jockey, I was looking at other avenues, and that's how I started to get into the commentating.''
Teaz' duties will also include some on-course presenting in due course and although it might be tough to be away from his wife for long periods, he could not let the chance pass.
''I couldn't turn this down - no matter how much it's changed my life - I could never say no to a job like this.
''I went through my list when it first arrived the other day and I thought, I'm going to places I never dreamed of calling. Westport on Boxing Day - awesome.''
