I've seldom seen my wife, Shona, as disconcerted as when I suddenly changed our holiday arrangements.
It was the evening of our fourth day in Istanbul and I wanted to visit one of the local travel agents to consider an organised tour for part of our time in Turkey.
We were due the next morning to find our way to the massive Istanbul intercity bus station to begin independent travel to Gallipoli and onwards.
Yet, here I was, with no warning and little time to make fresh arrangements, overturning our plans.
It is my job, in our family division of labour, to research and arrange travel, and I had been busy roughly working out how many days we might spend in various places and how we might get around.
We had our basic destinations sorted and I had decided the northeast towards Armenia and Georgia was too ambitious because Turkey is a lot bigger than most people realise, about seven times the area of New Zealand.
But I began to wonder, after enthusiastic recommendations from our hotel receptionist, if we might travel to the southeast near the Syrian border, the heart of Kurd and Arab Turkey.
I calculated that on our own we'd take a full day to get to the town near Gallipoli and then, without transport, would need a tour visit to the various battlegrounds and cemeteries.
Travelling to Troy by ourselves would be time-consuming and a little tricky, and the days would soon disappear as we waited for and switched buses, searched out accommodation and oriented ourselves to and around subsequent cities and sites.
All of a sudden, three more days were available thanks to the speed of tours, with another two saved by flying back from the southeast rather than enduring marathon bus trips. That would still leave most of our trip on our own at our own pace.
Luckily, businesses often stay open late because it was about 6pm before we returned from a day on the Bosphorus ferry and called in at "Hassle Free" tours.
The agent, of course, pushed for as extensive a trip as possible.
We knocked that back but did extend well beyond Gallipoli.
Fearful of being ripped off, Shona also insisted we go outside to evaluate these new proposals before agreeing to anything, only for the agent to follow us.
By nature Shona is not assertive, but I suspect the common Turkish male views of different roles for Western women would have been reinforced by her contribution.
I had played with, and investigated, tour options in New Zealand and in Istanbul, giving me some idea about costs and how they worked.
I should have, though, shared these thoughts much sooner.
Thank goodness the new plans turned out well, and we enjoyed both the organised tours and making our own way around.
All was therefore forgiven - or at least I hope so.
Nevertheless, as Shona justifiably said: "Don't you dare do anything like that again."
Tour Advantages
• Saves time: We travelled from Istanbul to Gallipoli with a half-day tour, to Ephesus and Troy (with tours), past Afrodisias to Pammukale (with tours) and to Fethiye on the Mediterranean Coast in five days. On our own, this would have taken at least eight.
• Saves effort and worry: We were picked up and met everywhere, supplied with lunches (with lots of tasty Turkish options) and taken to sites, much of which on our own would have entailed detailed research, a lot of waiting around and complicated arrangements.
• Gradual introduction to Turkish ways: We had a much better idea of Turkey transport, accommodation and so on by the end of the tour. We then felt more confident to venture independently.
• See more of the sites: The tour guides know where to go whereas you miss a lot when struggling with guide books. You're likely to whizz past places of interest on public buses, rather than having the choice to stop. I'm sure, too, in Cappadocia, the land of cave houses and "fairy chimneys", we missed significant sites by eschewing various day tours.
• Easier explanations: Good guides are easy to listen to, and they can fill you in better than sign boards and guide books. Troy, despite its layers of history, is relatively unspectacular. But it came alive because of a skilled archaeologist guide.
• Takes you to awkward places: Without your own transport you can't travel around Gallipoli, for example. The former Roman city of Afrodisias was well off the main road, and the house where Mary, mother of Jesus, is said to have lived out her days was also difficult to get to. Later, I spent hours trying to work out how to get to Mt Nemrut, where dramatic statues sit on a mountain top, on public transport, before resorting to a second tour. This lasted two days, and we left it in the southeast.
• You meet interesting people: We became friends with a South African rural valuer and his new beauty-therapist wife after travelling together; likewise on the Mt Nemrut leg with a young emergency department worker from a Boston hospital, a Harvard researcher in third-world microfinancing and a fitter and turner from Melbourne. It was comforting and nice to bump into familiar faces when paths crossed further on in our travels.
• Good source of information: Knowledgeable guides are useful for answering those questions prompted by what you observe as you go along.
Tour Disadvantages
• Missing challenges and adventures: Finding your own way around can be more satisfying, and you're bound to have memorable adventures and misadventures.
• Losing the freedom to choose: We were eager to do what we wanted when we wanted when the first tour was finished. The inevitable regimentation required wearies you.
• Extra costs: These are not necessarily large because the travel business in Turkey is competitive and agents, despite commissions, can probably secure substantial discounts on expenses like accommodation. One traveller we met estimated the additional costs at only 20%. Our five days with five tours, extensive travelling and another day by bus to Fethiye and six nights' accommodation (nothing fancy) cost 400 each (about $NZ900) and included breakfasts (most accommodation does so anyway) and substantial dinners at lunchtime.
The tours cover the entrance fees payable at most sites.
• Irritating people: We were fortunate not to strike anyone who drove us mad.
• Poor guides: While we were lucky; some guides can be dull or spout inaccuracies and exaggerations. We overheard one or two in Istanbul who left me wondering. Less contact with local people: While we'd be happy to be shielded from the persistent touts, serendipitous meetings with locals add much interest and are much, much more likely when travelling alone.
These interactions helped me learn a smattering of Turkish words.
• Crowds of other tourists: The suggestion to arrive at the most popular sites as soon as they open is one of the best pieces of advice in Lonely Planet. We were making the most of space at the harem at the Topkapi Palace in Istanbul for about 40 minutes before the tour parties descended and the experience was downgraded.
We were also able to explore at leisure an alternative underground Christian city in central Turkey which was less popular with the tours and during the lunch break common to tours.
• Sometimes being rushed: We would have liked more time at the former Roman cities of Ephesus, Afrodisias and Hierapolis (the white terraces).
